Women Speak but Are They Heard?
Maybe its Time to Start Listening, Really Listening
It's well known that women are believed less than men. Our opinions need to be backed by decades worth of scientific facts, papers, and a panel of experts led by other men before the possibility of us being correct can even be pondered.
In the wake of the Hollywood Sex Circuit Scandal, women and men are coming out nearly every day with horrific stories of assault, abuse, and harassment from the biggest names in the business over a period of decades and the discussion is beginning to move into a familair territory.
"Great, another guy loses his entire career because of one accusation from years ago."
This is the direction that the conversation needs to move in. In fact, let's just put up a giant roadblock sign right here and get back to the issue at hand. What is the issue? Let me help you unpack this.
Women are coming forward with their stories after staying silent for many years out of fear of, what? LOSING THEIR ENTIRE CAREERS! We are damned if we do and damned if we don't. Take it and keep quiet, or speak up to protect our minds, bodies, and souls, and risk losing our entire body of work, our way of life, our employment, and let us be burdened with public shaming and possible threats to our person.
Women Aren't the Only Ones
A throng of men have come out in the aftermath of Weinstein to tell their own stories against Kevin Spacey and other celebrities. These stories or accusations are just as harrowing, yet the same vitriol does not seem to be present. When these men came forward, it appears that the entire industry and the internet itself took a long, deep breath. When it came back up for air, its attention went back to the actresses and what damage they're doing.
Corey Feldman - Child Star and Activist
Of course, the first actresses to speak out are now targets of internet vitriol. However, these women aren't alone. Child star and activist Corey Feldman has been trying to tell us for years. In fact, he's been desperate to be heard.
Now, with the stories against Hollywood's most elite comes the uncomfortable truth that has been ignored for decades. EVERYONE KNEW. The police knew. The agents knew. Actors knew. Actresses and directors and producers all knew and have known what has been happening in the small little neighborhood of Hollywood, California.
Corey Feldman is just another victim who has been tasked with being the leader, the whistleblower, to the detriment of his career and health. Even now, as others have come forward, Feldman's bus was stopped and searched in Louisiana. The long arm of silence does not discriminate.
Still, Feldman has taken his story and run with it for many years now, even going so far as to identify an abuser just this morning on the Dr. Oz Show.
"I’m the one who’s trying to come forward and do something about it.”
Feldman's interviews with the media aside, he makes a fair point. Why do we put such burdens on the victims of abuse? Why do we collectively fail to support those who come forward in the same way that we support victims of car accidents or other tragedies?
Corey Feldman Appears on the Dr. Oz Show to Talk About Hollywood's Abuse Problem
Listen to Women, to Me
I'm a mother of three children. My youngest child is my only daughter and I can tell you now that she is a teenager our talks have become deeper and more terrifying than the talks I've had with my sons, who are now adults. She talks about preventing rape in school. She talks about walking in groups to cars and keeping her phone on her at all times, even when she's at a friend's house.
Women have so much to fear and so little to gain from making false statements. We should not need the voices of men to make our own stories more believable. We ought to be believed because we are human. We do not want to be touched by strangers, we do not want to be ogled by supervisors, and we do not want to listen to bad sex jokes from creepy peers.
More importantly, we need you to hear us when we tell you to stop. We need you to put your ego aside and listen. We just want to go to work and do a good job. We want to go home and relax and have dinner. We absolutely do not want to run into the office and worry every minute of the day that you're going to make an excuse to be alone with us, to touch us, to brush up against our backs, and stroke our hair.
Believe me when I tell you this.