Cell Phones Are a Public Nuisance!

Updated on August 23, 2017
"Please Turn Off Cell Phones" poster by Fred May
"Please Turn Off Cell Phones" poster by Fred May | Source

Cell Phones Are the Biggest Pest Since the Mosquito!

I am fed up with cell phones in public! Drivers riding around with cell phones "glued" to their ears endanger the lives of others while they chatter incessantly, paying not one iota of attention to where they're going (especially while *shudder* texting); shoppers in stores roadblock an entire aisle, all the while carrying on some frivolous and redundant conversation to an apparent simpleton on the other end; restaurant patrons frequently conduct violent arguments on their cell phones, bantering with hostile ex-spouses, unfortunately, within earshot of the entire restaurant.

Personally, I wish cell phones had never been invented. The modern world has long been barraged by noise pollution, but as far as I'm concerned, the pesky cell phone is the straw that broke the camel's back. Because of the cell phone (or should I say cell phone users), it's becoming increasingly difficult to preserve one's sanity. Everywhere I go, I find myself one step closer to being committed as I encounter babbling idiots and pesky ringtones--even in the john, for god's sake! As Andy Griffith once said, "You beat everything Barney, you know that?"

I Hate Cell Phones!

Cell Phone Shopper Poster
Cell Phone Shopper Poster | Source

Case in Point

I have worked in retail for thirty-one years. Oh, how I pine for the good ol' days when cell phones were nowhere to be seen. But, alas, those days will never--ever--ever come again.

Working for a retail giant over a quarter of a century has finally reduced me to this--loudly ranting and raving about public cell phone use to whoever will listen!

The last straw happened just a few days ago. As a cashier, I had almost completed checking out a woman (let's call her Cell Phone Sally), when suddenly she stopped to answer her ringing cell phone--right when I was trying to give her the total! If she would have waited just a few more seconds to answer the phone, she could have paid and gotten out of the way. But NOOOOO! This woman was obviously on another planet, totally oblivious to her surroundings.

In the meantime, my line of shoppers awaiting checkout was steadily growing and if looks could kill, Cell Phone Sally would be a dead woman by now! I finally shouted the total at her, hoping she would hear; as the old expression goes: "The light was on, but no one was home." Sally briefly looked up, looked away, then resumed her conversation.

Shouting even louder, I repeated her total. She pulled out a debit card, stopped, looked away, then resumed her conversation. Gritting my teeth, I gently slid the debit card from her hand and swiped it. Now, the register was requesting her pin number. In the meantime, two more people joined the checkout line, for a total count of eight. I waved the debit card in her face, hoping she would at least attempt to read my lips as I asked for her pin number. Mercifully, the conversation ended before the irate woman behind her dented her derriere with a shopping cart. As Sally finally removed her carcass, you could almost hear the customers behind her say, "Good riddance!"

Restaurant Gives a Discount for Leaving Cell Phone at the Door

Cell Phone Shenanigans - Here Just a Few Cell Phone Faux Pas I Have Witnessed:

  • One day, while walking toward my car in the parking lot of the store I work in, I heard ear-piercing screams. Thinking the worst, I looked to see what the trouble was. Standing beside her SUV was a young woman, conducting a violent argument on her cell phone--apparently with her ex--over child support. The woman alternated between hollering and breaking into ear-piercing screams while frantically waving her arms. I felt so sorry for the poor baby in the car seat, who was screaming, too.
  • As a cashier, I can't begin to tell you how many customers I get that are so wrapped up in their phones, they never even acknowledge that I exist; it's like I'm part of the furniture! They don't look at me, don't speak to me (even when I speak to them), and are constantly forgetting their bags. When I run after them with their left behind bag, am I acknowledged for the good deed? Nooooo! I'm still part of the furniture! :-( Let me tell you--with treatment like that, I'm very tempted not to notice the left behind bag! ;-)
  • One day, after working hard at our jobs all week, my husband & I decided to relax with a pleasant evening out, so we went to a nice restaurant--FORGET THAT IDEA! The next thing you know, a young man two tables down begins conducting a loud cell phone argument with his mother. He proceeds to cuss her out, and hangs up the phone. "Good! Now we can eat in peace!" I thought.--WRONG! The man's mother calls him back, and it starts all over again!
  • Several times, while utilizing the public restroom at work, I have encountered women answering their cell phones while doing their business. All I have to say is, "Have you totally lost your minds, people?"
  • While working my former job in the pet department of a department store, I once had a man interrupt me while I stocked, requesting that I catch some tropical fish for him. It was a very busy day, and I had a ton of work to do. While I stood there waiting to see what kind of fish he wanted, he proceeded to put me on hold while he answered his cell phone. The man got into a heated argument with the other party (apparently his ex) over visitation rights and child support. After ten minutes of waiting, I threw up my hands and walked off.

Photo credit: Art.com
Photo credit: Art.com

Cell Phone Bra-Talker Takes the Cake!

One day, while working my usual job running a cash register, I noticed a young girl on the register to the left of me moving her mouth and talking down into her cleavage. "What a weird girl!," I thought. It was a very slow day, and there wasn't anyone around at the time, so I wondered what was up.

Later on, while passing by her to take some items to the service desk, I heard her voice (still with no one around), then I heard a masculine voice reply to her--and it was coming out of her bra!

That's right, folks--she had her cell phone, which was set on speaker phone, down in her bra so she could secretly talk to her boyfriend while working! Talk about cell phone addiction! Needless to say--this girl wasn't employed for long!

Photo credit: Art.com
Photo credit: Art.com

Woman's Dog Almost Becomes Road Kill While She Gabs on Cell Phone

While driving home from work the other day, I saw a woman on a cell phone walking along the side of the road, involved in an apparently "fascinating" conversation while her dog trotted along beside her.

I had a feeling that the dog might come toward the road, so I slowed down. My intuition was right: the dog began coming across the road, so I quickly hit the brakes. I sat there in my car with this dog plopped down in front of me--I had had a long day at work, and I wanted to go home! Apparently the dog had other ideas. I honked my horn several times to get rid of the mangy mongrel, who trotted back to its owner, and, hopefully, out of harm's way.

The dog's owner was so hypnotized in conversation, that she never once looked away, even when I honked. She will never know just how close her dog came to being road kill (Lucky for her that I wasn't distracted by my cell phone!). Just another example of the danger of cell phone distraction!


Dingy Cell Phone Addict Loses Her Job Over Non-Stop Cell Phone Use

A few years ago, a greeting card vendor at my store (I work for a retail giant) lost her job over her cell phone addiction. Even while "working," this woman simply could not put her cell phone away. Every time I saw her, she had a cell phone "riveted" to her ear. Whenever I overheard her conversations, she sounded like a giggly thirteen-year-old flirting with her boyfriend.

Because of my job at the time, I had the "pleasure" of seeing this woman almost every day in the stockroom, and also out on the floor by the greeting card racks. While in the stockroom, instead of dealing with her vast inventory of cards, the woman would walk around in circles with a phone to her head--giggling, flirting, and gesturing, as if the person listening on the other end could see her. Rarely would I see her perform any small inkling of her job, and when she did, it consisted of briefly peeking inside a box, only to stop, so she could resume her much more important mission of giggling, flirting, and gesturing.

While "working" out on the sales floor, the woman continued to talk on the cell phone when she should have been stocking new cards on the shelves, removing old ones, and setting up new displays.

It didn't take the greeting card company long to realize that no work was getting accomplished, so they cut the cell phone addict vendor's hours back to a ridiculous schedule (something like two or three hours a week) so she would get fed up and quit. Then they gave the part-time vendor (who did a very good job, by the way) the cell phone addict vendor's schedule. The cell-phone addict vendor predictably quit, and the former part-time vendor has been doing a great job as a full-time vendor ever since--and never once have I seen her with a cell phone while working.

Mad Dog Woman

Here is the story of "Mad Dog Woman." As you read the story, you won't have to question how she got her name:

Here I am, stocking in the pet department of my "beloved" retail place of employment, when I hear a call go out over the PA: "Customer needs assistance at the paint booth!" Okie, dokie, I go over there--I am a team player, and I do try to help out when I can.

So here I am--helping the lady out--squirting various tints in the can needed for the desired color, carefully hammering the lid back on, then placing the can in the shaker--when all of a sudden I hear someone scream out the "F" word!

My customer and I turn around to the sight of what I call "Mad Dog Woman." Her face is distorted by anger, her mouth is open wide; she looks exactly like a rabid dog--teeth everywhere, head violently shaking, body quivering--just like the infamous "Cujo" from horror movie fame. I'm willing to bet, too, that anyone coming within five feet of her, would get splattered by all that foam spewing from her mouth.

As she stomps, gesticulates, and cusses, practically every other word out of her mouth is the "F" word. It is apparent that whoever she is talking to, she wishes dead, and in the worst way! This torture goes on for about five minutes, but seems more like an hour.

Mad Dog Woman (unintentionally) provided entertainment to more than a few shoppers that day; what was a relief when she finally left. As the old song goes, "silence is golden."

The Dangers of Texting While Driving

Texting While Driving? Don't Even Think About It!


Caught on Tape! Truck Drivers Texting While Driving!

Young Man Drives Off Cliff While Texting

Texting Teen Drives into Trains

The Dangers of Texting While Walking

Man Almost Runs into Bear While Texting

New Jersey Town Makes Texting While Walking Illegal


According to Wikipedia, "Sexting is the act of sending sexually explicit messages, primarily between mobile phones. The term was first popularized in the early 21st century, and is a portmanteau of sex and texting, where the latter is meant in the wide sense of sending a text possibly with images."

Employees Fired For Sexting in the Workplace

A few years ago, at the retail chain where I work, three people were involved in a sexting incident. It started off with an employee sending a humorous sexually explicit photo as a joke to a co-worker. The co-worker, in turn, sent it to a female associate, who, to put it lightly, was not amused. She immediately reported it to management, who terminated the two offenders with no chance of rehire. I haven't seen them set foot in the store since.

Watch, Listen, and Learn. . . .

Watch & Learn - But please turn off your cell phone first! :)

Cell Phone Etiquette

Cell Phones & Church Don't Mix

Cell Phone Use in Restaurants

Should Cooks in Restaurants Use Cell Phones While Working?

In my job as a cashier, I meet and converse with lots of people. Just recently, a customer told me she had just gotten a job at McDonald's, but she was already thinking about quitting. When I asked her why, she said that all the cooks, and even the supervisor, are using cell phones while preparing and cooking food, and they expect her (the newbie) to cover their butts by taking up the slack.

Can you imagine? When preparing and cooking food, one's hands should be clean; these people are handling germy cell phones then touching our food!

TheKansasCityChannel.com, a subsidiary of ABC, recently reported some alarming findings: "tens of thousands of bacteria live on each square inch of a phone, including Staphylococcus aureus (Staph), which can cause pimples or boils, and even pneumonia and meningitis."

Hard to believe, but cell phone handsets are more contaminated than toilets!


Cell Phone Humor

"Please Turn Off Cell Phones" poster by Fred May
"Please Turn Off Cell Phones" poster by Fred May | Source

Are Cell Phones a Public Nuisance?

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